Episode 98. Why Clients Buy Coaching (Part 1): Being THAT Coach

In the last 60 days of 2022, we’ve been coaching our clients a lot on how to finish the year strong.

In November, we hosted a 6-week challenge for our private clients to be more creative in talking about their offer, help them make more offers with even more boldness and creativity, and also strengthen their belief in their identity as a coach or their belief in the offer they’re selling, so that they can finish the year proudly and boldly step into 2023 with new clients to coach and work with.

There are two versions of the challenge for our clients to choose from: The first is the Dream Coach challenge, and the second is the Dream Offer challenge.

Since this is what I worked on behind the scenes with our clients, I wanted to share some nuggets also on this podcast so that all of us can also be in full on “Let’s get to work” and “I got nothing to lose” mode.

Before we dive in, if anything we talk about in this series resonates with you and it’s how you want to take your brand and business to the next level, I’d love to invite you to join us inside the Thought Leader Club 1:1 + Community Program focused on helping you step into the version of you who stops following else’s playbook of “traditional success” and instead, proudly create something that’s truly of your own.

In the Thought Leader Club, you will become a thought leader both internally and externally. You’ll learn to build a body of work that not only lets you become known for something but also magnetizes clients and opportunities to you. It is undoubtedly one of the most powerful SKILLS you can learn in your lifetime as an entrepreneur.

In just 4 months, you’ll go from not having much to show for despite spending HOURS every week working diligently on content, to seeing noticeable shifts and progress towards both your short term and long term goals.

I cannot wait to welcome you inside, so for all of the details, head on over to cheryltheory.com/program to send in your application. We’ll then book a sales call to make sure that the program is the best fit for you and we can onboard you as early as next week.

In This Episode:

A two-part series on being THAT coach and selling THAT offer
Becoming THAT coach who is proud of their offer and who deeply cares about helping their people
Becoming THAT coach who knows how to coach and help clients create results
Becoming THAT coach who is so clear and convicted about their message and what their values are
Who do you need to be right now to become one of the best in your industry?

A two-part series on being THAT coach and selling THAT offer

We’re going to do a two-part series on this podcast. Over the next two episodes on this show, I want to specifically break down the two biggest reasons why clients buy coaching:

Episode 98: Being THAT Coach that clients want to work with → specifically, the three key characteristics that some of the most successful and in-demand coaches embody, and how you can start becoming that coach and step into that identity as well.

Episode 99: Selling THAT Offer that people have on their vision boards or where clients literally screenshot your IG stories where you are solely talking about your offer. Literally. → I say this because we’ve had clients inside our programs tell me that our coaching program was on their goals list and they screenshot my content onto their phone camera roll before they ever booked a sales call with me.

SO YES. This is going to be such a fun two-part series.

Let’s dive into the three core characteristics I believe the BEST, most successful coaches in the industry embody, and why I believe these characteristics are going to help you become a name that stands the test of time in the industry, even when so many people are falling off after being in the game for a few months or a few years at most.

I’ll also be weaving practical tips or things for you to consider so you can also become that coach that clients genuinely want to work with.

Becoming THAT coach who is proud of their offer and who deeply cares about helping their people

I’m starting with this characteristic for a very intentional reason. I honestly think a lot of people don’t realize the importance of being a coach who is truly backing their offer and work, and who really, really cares about people.

I say this because I too often see people who really have the heart and desire to help others through coaching, but they also get so seeped into frustration, anxiety, and desperation when it’s been a few months and they haven’t been signing clients consistently.

That’s when their focus is no longer on how they can help someone right now, but instead focused on how they’re so stressed and discouraged about not signing a client.

Now, I can hear some of you saying, “Oh but that’s easy for you to say, Cheryl. You do have clients to work with and help.”

I totally acknowledge that it’s frustrating to be working on your business for months and months, feeling like you’re trying everything, but still not signing clients or doing so consistently.

I get it because I’ve been there, both during my side hustler days AND even now as a full time coach. No one is immune to “client drought” months, no matter what income level they’re at in their business.

But I do want to emphasize: Personally, I was a side hustler for three years before becoming a full-time coach. THREE YEARS.

Real talk: How many people have even made it past their three year anniversary of starting their business? Versus how many chose to give up on their business after not even 12 months, because they were discouraged about their “lack of results”?

That’s why the first point for this conversation is: If you want to be a coach that clients want to work with, you HAVE to be willing to be in the game for as long as it takes.

On a more practical or actionable level, this means that you HAVE to be committed to making offers no matter what. Even when you have no clients reaching out and no existing clients, you HAVE to stay COMMITTED to talking about your offer and how you can help people.

Make offers, even when there are no sales calls booked or no applications received in your inbox.

The rationale for this is really simple: You HAVE to be willing to be a leader for your people and show up for your people, even with absolute silence.

The coaches who truly are leaders in their niche or industry are willing to demonstrate emotional resilience and keep going, even when things are discouraging AF.

They continue to decide to lead by example and keep telling the world that their program can help you, simply because they believe in their work and their ability to help someone.

THAT is the level of belief I want all of us to have in what we do, as well as the level of commitment we have to showing up for not just our people, but also for our work.

Be THAT proud of what you do.

Because the truth is, if you aren’t even showing up in a way that expresses your belief in your offer or how excited and proud you are of your offer, why should clients have any trust and belief in you?

Clients deserve to work with a coach who genuinely cares about the quality of their work and coaching and who truly, deeply cares about helping people.

To anyone who might have fallen out of love with their business – perhaps you’re just thinking what’s the point if I’m not signing clients, or you feel like it’s easier for other coaches because they’ve already created XYZ results or are signing clients consistently.

Or maybe it’s not that deep, but you also just haven’t been making offers and showing up boldly and powerfully to share about how you can help someone.

Now is THE time to really lean into what you DO love about the work that you do

Here’s a prompt for you to journal on and reflect on: What specifically do you love so much about your work as a coach or what you do in your business, that you’re willing to do it even for free?

Then, show up boldly and proudly to talk about the specific parts of your coaching or work that you absolutely love. People deserve to work with a coach who clearly likes what they do.

I’d even argue: Be so proud of your work and so excited to help people, so much so that actually being on the Zoom call with the client brings you way more of a high or sense of joy or fulfilment or pride than getting a Stripe invoice paid.

Let me riff a bit about how INCREDIBLE it is that we even get to do this in the first place. SERIOUSLY.

How incredible is it that we get to create content that we’re proud of, and it helps people? For free?!

How incredible is it that we get to tap into our creativity, especially when our 9-5 jobs don’t let us use that part of our brain?

How incredible is it that we’re constantly developing new skills (ex: communication skills via IG stories and writing captions)?

How can we ever get upset about our business when it’s teaching us SO MUCH and helping us develop so many transferable skills, while simultaneously moving towards our income and impact goals?

Even if we aren’t “there yet”, we’re still moving closer to our goals.

They all count. Every single day counts. Every single piece of content counts.

Every single time we show up in front of our community, it counts.

They all will compound together and propel us toward our goals. It all counts.

When I think back on my own journey where I made my first $100k while being a side hustler, I didn’t have a coach who necessarily gave me a step-by-step content or launch plan or told me what to do.

Instead, I got my brain coached on my thoughts, identity and mindset. I was committed to doing my self-coaching so I could learn to better manage my thoughts and emotions.

I was also committed to being resourceful and creative when it came to my content, marketing and selling.

I took responsibility for my business and didn’t complain. I just kept doing the work.

Eventually, I was able to become a full-time entrepreneur because I stayed committed to “being in the game” for as long as it takes.

I took responsibility for my decision-making in my business. I took responsibility for making the ROI (return-on-investment) back from every investment and implemented everything I learned, both the strategy and mindset tools.

I took responsibility over getting coached, doing my self-coaching, and relistening to my coaching call replays.

I took responsibility over creating the BEST content that is helpful to my ideal client and continuing to think of creative ways to talk about how I can help people via my coaching program.

This is how I got “results”

… Even as a side hustler

… Even when life happens

… Even when I felt like my coach didn’t “get” me

… Even when I had low shitty mental health days

… Even when I was tired from my career/PhD

… Even when I felt alone on this journey

… Even when I wasn’t getting engagement on IG

… Even when my IG stories views were low

… Even when I was questioning my marketing or comparing myself to others

→ I still created results because I always took responsibility for my actions, kept making decisions, and stayed committed to implementing my plan.

Now, I’m in my fourth year of coaching and my commitment to my business is stronger than ever. I’m more committed than ever to helping side hustlers create more career options for themselves.

It’s my mission to help more people create their dream career and business, not the one that their parents expect of them.

My gratitude towards my business is higher than ever and I’m so grateful that we get to create something out of nothing that helps people and makes money. How amazing is that!?!?!?

All that to say: Stay in gratitude. Take responsibility and make decisions. Keep talking about how you can help people.

You got this 🙂

Becoming THAT coach who knows how to coach and help clients create results

Along with being THAT coach who is proud of their offer and deeply cares about helping their people, we also want to work with coaches who KNOW how to help their client get results.

Let’s start with a question to get really honest. Do you truly believe in the value of your coaching offer? If yes, how can you be EVEN MORE in love with your offer? How can you show up in a way that communicates that ?

If not, why is that? Really honestly answer that question, and create a solution for it.

For example, is it because you don’t know if you can actually help someone get the result you’re promising? And let’s get even more nuanced:
- Is it because you don’t have “proof “ of helping someone create those results before?
- Is it because you’ve only done this for one person and you feel like it’s not enough social proof yet?
- Have you not created those results before for yourself?
- Or have you been able to help someone before, whether it’s yourself or someone else, but you feel like the perogram promise is just too bold?

Or maybe it’s because you’re currently working with clients but they aren’t getting the result you promised?

Whatever your specific reason for feeling shaky in your offer and in your belief in being a coach who can coach their clients to create results, it is your responsibility to both coach yourself on your belief AND work on practicing and bettering your skills.

That might look different for everyone. It might mean doing more free coaching, creating new resources and training for your clients or re-listening to coaching calls and identifying exactly what additional coaching you could give your client.

It might be spending time thinking about why your clients aren’t getting results and literally telling them.

It might mean raising your standards of yourself and being a product of your own product.

There’s a range of solutions, but we’ve got to be honest with ourselves about the situation first and foremost. This is where the dream coach version of you would be resourceful and take responsibility over the situation and find solutions.

Here’s a practical tip I highly recommend: Creating time blocks in your calendar for something I like to call thinking time.

For example, in my business, I’m committed to figure out how to teach something better or create a new workshop for clients if they’re getting stuck on something.

If I have to explain something 20 different times before it lands, I will do so.

This not only makes me a better coach, but it helps clients be more successful in our program.

Some of my BEST work stems from being faced with a client who is struggling to implement our process or get results, which challenges me to think of how to coach or teach something from a different angle.

The truth is, the BEST coaches are SO committed to their craft and practice as a coach and being able to help their clients get results.

Right now, how much time are you spending thinking about how confident you aren’t about yourself or maybe how you’re lacking client results?

Versus actually doing the work to figure this out or how to be an even better coach or teacher for your clients, hence becoming THAT coach who has such high belief in their ability to help their clients create results?

When you believe in your offer, your selling gets better. The way you show up is completely different compared to feeling unsure about whether you can even help someone.

The way you explain how your offer isn’t just going to help someone with certain immediate outcomes, but it’s also gonna change the long-term trajectory of their life. It hits differently when you actually believe you can help your client when they are inside your program.

We’ll talk more about this in the second episode of this series. But for now, I want to encourage you to think about how you can be even more bold about your offer. Because the truth is, no one else is being bold about how they can help others.

Take responsibility to better your own skills and craft, and your ability to help people get results. Even if you don’t have a client right now.

Likewise: Take responsibility to show up the way your ideal clients need you to talk about your offer and how you can help them.

People deserve to feel confident in their purchasing decision before they’re in the program and after they actually join the program.

Becoming THAT coach who is so clear and convicted about their message and what their values are

In my humble opinion, the leaders of the coaching industry are courageous and willing to go first when it comes to sharing their values, message, beliefs and what they stand for.

Because they’re willing to go first, they make the largest impact. And when we impact others, we make money.

When I say “be clear and confident about sharing your message”, I don’t just mean talking about your offers, the skills and tools you’ll use to help people, or anything related to your paid offer and how it helps people.

Instead, I’m referring to the bigger, larger, deeper message that drives your entire business and brand – the WHY behind what you do.

For example, I continue to share my law school quitting story from 2018 to this day, and it’s been nearly 5 years. Because of the underlying message behind the story, it’s a message that honestly is the driving force behind why my business came about in the first place.

Hence I’m so committed to sharing it over and over again, even years after it happened. Because that’s how much it matters not just to me, but I also believe it can help others.

For some context, you’ll probably hear me talk about the lessons I’ve learned from my decision to quit law school, which include the following:

Sometimes, creating a life that is truly aligned to you and what you want is NOT what others expect of you. This means you have to stand firm when pursuing what you truly believe in and always take full responsibility for your decisions and actions.

It’s okay if people don’t support you in the beginning. Stay committed to your vision and goal.

Ultimately, creating an aligned life, career, and business is a choice you have to make. There’s no right or wrong. Just make a decision and move forward.

That’s also why I’m so adamant about all of us building amazing side hustles and businesses. Because this is a career.

Your side hustle is legit. It can make a serious income and serious impact.

This is a career truly created by yourself and it’s something you can be so proud of. Even if it’s not exactly what others expect of you or hope you’d do. Even if others may have thoughts or judgments about it, even if people may not get it.

And to share this repeatedly often requires courage. It’s not easy to be vulnerable on the Internet. Truly.

But if you deeply believe in the impact of your message, keep going.

Keep sharing it because you know it will help someone. You share it because you want to help people think differently about their own situation.

You want to offer them hope and possibility. You want to push them to think bigger for themselves.

Very recently, I think, within the month of October 2022, I received two very different responses in regards to my story about quitting law school almost five years ago.

One morning I got a comment on one of my posts where I mentioned my law school quitting story.

This person deleted the comment before I could actually take a full screenshot. But I managed to screenshot the notification on my phone, so I got parts of it before the notification got cut off.

It said something along the lines of, “Incredible. A bunch of spoiled privileged upper class children who were offered the world in terms of education opportunities, lifestyles and consequently careers, only to throw it all away because they’re bored. Bravo, Cheryl.”

Honestly, it sucked. It really hurts when strangers online make assumptions about you without any basis. Without even knowing you or anything about your background, and choosing to decide to make assumptions based on the tiny slivers of information I share online. It sucks.

It also sucks that they completely disregard the efforts and hard work I’ve put in to pave my own path.

And as much as I wanted to stand up for myself, I also acknowledge that they are entitled to their own opinions. I have no desire or capacity to try to explain myself to people who already decided to hold a certain opinion of me, without truly taking the time to understand my thought processes, values, my character, and so on.

They’re not right or wrong for their decisions, and I’m not right or wrong for my decisions.

We’re both allowed to have our own viewpoints. Even though they chose to paint a certain narrative of me, I also get to choose the narrative I paint of myself.

Always choose your own narrative and story of yourself, over someone else’s definition or version of you. Always.

And what’s absolutely fascinating about this is that, simultaneously, around the same period I received this comment, I had someone send me a DM on Instagram and we started having a conversation.

In one of their first message, they shared, “I just wanted to drop a random message to say thank you for being an inspiration to side hustlers, especially on days that are a little discouraging, it’s nice to see your positivity ✨️ ✨️ ✨️ on my IG stories!”.

They also shared that the Side Hustle Club podcast and my IG stories have served as inspirations for them to make a decision for themselves regarding their career.

The incredible thing is, shortly after, they indeed did make a decision regarding their career. And they said “Thanks for the indirect encouragement (probably without you knowing the difference but Side Hustle Club podcast has been an inspiration)”.

And throughout our conversations, they specifically mentioned how my decisions and thought process behind them, such as the decision to quit law school, have really helped her think through her situation and ultimately decide for herself.

THIS is exactly why I do what I do. THIS is why I continue to share my story and message even though I have clear evidence that there will be people who disagree or have things to say, and it does suck.

I am still so committed to sharing my message and I have so much conviction about it because I know that what I have to say matters. It can help someone.

This is why I do what I do in my brand and business and I’m very, very proud of it.

Who do you need to be right now to become one of the best in your industry?

All that to say. We don’t wake up one day and decide to share something vulnerable on the Internet because we want to get attention.

For most of us, we’re terrified of the keyboard warriors online. But we’re willing to do it because we believe that we have something to say, and it can help someone.

It’s also making decisions in your business from this mindset. What decision are you willing to make or willing to NOT make in order to help people and amplify your message and work to your people? Rather than, for example, making a decision from the mindset of what will make you the most money this month?

Really think about who are coaches you’ve wanted to work with. What do they stand for? What messages were important to them and their community? What were their values? What opinions do they strongly hold?

More likely than not, the coaches we want to work with have something to say and they have their own thought leadership about both the work they do and about life in general.

With that, what are YOUR opinions? Your values? Your message? What are you willing to stand firmly behind?

Here’s something for you to consider: Be willing to get clear on what you want to say and don’t be afraid to say what you mean. Focus on getting clearer and sharper in your messaging about exactly that.

Be willing to take months to improve your skills on talking about the same thing, over and over again, with more potency and impact over time.

Stay committed to sharing what you believe in because our clients want to work with the best of the best in the industry, and rightfully so.

Who do you need to be right now to become one of the best in your industry?

Let’s do a quick recap of what we’ve talked about in this episode.

If you want to become a coach who clients are so excited about working with, the type of coach where clients literally plan months in advance to save up so that they can work with you as soon as possible, I would encourage you to think about the following:

#1: How can you Be THAT coach who is proud of their offer and who deeply cares about helping their people

#2 How can you Be THAT coach who knows how to coach and help clients create results

#3 How can you BeTHAT coach who is so clear and convicted about their message and what their values are

Here’s a common thread that runs through all of the three key characteristics we talked about: Being the coach that clients genuinely want to work with, doesn’t mean being perfect. Rather, there are so many other characteristics and qualities that our ideal clients look for when they’re deciding who they want to work with.

It’s our job to get clear on who we need to become, right now

It starts with understanding who that dream coach version of you is, what decision they’d make, what characteristics and values and qualities they embody, what skills they’d hone in on, and so on.

Then, choosing to become that and do that, right now.

It’s both an identity as well as making decisions that’ll help you step into that identity even further. It’s both a mindset and action plan.

And hey, this is part of what we will coach on inside our Thought Leader Club 1:1 + Community Program.

So if you’re ready to step into the identity of a coach who clients genuinely want to work with and become that dream coach that’s on clients vision boards, I’d love to invite you to join us inside the Thought Leader Club 1:1 + Community Program focused on helping you build a body of work that not only lets you become known for something but also magnetizes clients and opportunities to you.

For all of the details and to apply, you can head on over to cheryltheory.com/program.

I cannot wait to see you become the dream coach who is proud of their offer and who deeply cares about helping their people, who knows how to coach and help clients create results, and who is so clear and confident about their message and what their values are.

FUN TIMES AHEAD.

Sounds good? Awesome. Let’s get to work.