Episode 166. How to Build a Sustainable & Relaxed Solopreneur Business: 5 Lessons from 5 Years

In the past 5 years, I’ve learned many core lessons on how to build thought leadership and be a successful solopreneur. These lessons allowed me to not just quit my job (PhD) and make money online through my coaching business, but also create work life balance and build my dream lifestyle as a solopreneur & podcaster.

In This Episode:

Lesson 1: Being committed and consistent
Lesson 2: Own your shortcomings and insecurities
Lesson 3: I don’t need to impress anyone
Lesson 4: The first few years of trial and error are necessary for shaping you to become the entrepreneur you’re meant to be
Lesson 5: Time will pass… So what are you going to do with this time?

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Lessons of building thought leadership and being a successful solopreneur

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Holy crap I cannot believe that this is an episode I’m creating, but it’s FIVE WHOLE ASS YEARS since I officially put my business out into the world. Five full years have passed since March 6 2019 as I’m recording this. I’ve learned a hell of a lot in five years.

Years ago, making it to the 5 year mark of my business seemed, it didn’t necessarily seem impossible, but it just wasn’t even in my realm of awareness.

Over the years, I’ve seen a lot of people come and go in the online entrepreneurship space, and I can’t deny that I’m pretty proud of myself for not just staying in the game, but I’m also more committed than ever before to keep going, keep growing, and keep creating amazingness for others through this business,

Today, I want to specifically share my top 5 lessons when it comes to building a sustainable thought leadership business that is here to stay.

I know that for you who’s listening to this, your work matters deeply to you, so I want to support you in continuing to do what you do, no matter what natural ups and downs you may face moving forward in your journey as an entrepreneur.

Here are my top 5 lessons from the past 5 years.

Lesson 1: Being committed and consistent

The truth is, I’ve never gone viral once in the past 5 years.

My Instagram engagement has plummeted since 2022 and I get relatively low views on my Instagram stories and most of my feed posts get around 10 likes or less.

My business revenue in the past year has been up and down, so my business numbers are not exactly what you’d deem consistent, especially in the past year.

But you know what I’m 100% certain of? I’m so damn confident that I’m committed to my work and that I’m here to stay for the long term.

My podcast, The Thought Leader Club program, showing up for my clients, audience, and community at large, teaching folks how to build a body of work and become known for their unique thought leadership – I’m committed to the work I do for all of the above.

Being in the game for five years has shown me that no matter what my own business results are, I’m confident that no one can outlast me in terms of commitment and consistency.

If anything, the more unstable ups and downs I see in my business, the more stability I create within myself. Because I’m not here to just make some quick money and then bounce to the next trending business opportunity.

All in all, this work matters to me. And I’m nowhere close to being done with what I’m here to do. There are people to help, content to create, and work to do. This is just the beginning and I cannot be any more excited to double down on doing even better work for you all.

The question that might now come up is how can we strengthen our sense of commitment to what we do?

Although I think I do intrinsically have a deep sense of commitment to my work, I also am of the belief that commitment is like any other character skill, whereby you can hone and strengthen a skill.

I did some quick research and was looking at a paper titled, Fostering and Measuring Skills: Interventions That Improve Character and Cognition – it was published in 2013 by James J. Heckman & Tim Kautz, and is quite well cited.

I want to read out a snippet of the paper’s abstract:

“Character is a skill, not a trait. At any age, character skills are stable across different tasks, but skills can change over the life cycle. Character is shaped by families, schools, and social environments. Skill development is a dynamic process, in which the early years lay the foundation for successful investment in later years.

High-quality early childhood and elementary school programs improve character skills in a lasting and cost-effective way. Many of them beneficially affect later-life outcomes without improving cognition. There are fewer long-term evaluations of adolescent interventions, but workplace-based programs that teach character skills are promising.

The common feature of successful interventions across all stages of the life cycle through adulthood is that they promote attachment and provide a secure base for exploration and learning for the child. Successful interventions emulate the mentoring environments offered by successful families.”

I was also reading the book, Hidden Potential, by Adam Grant, who is a bestselling author and currently teaches at Wharton School, at University of Pennsylvania. He wrote in his book, ”Character is often confused with personality, but they’re not the same. Personality is your predisposition—your basic instincts for how to think, feel, and act. Character is your capacity to prioritize your values over your instincts.”

I think this is a great distinction because It’s easy to prioritize your values when the stakes are low. But your true character is revealed when you have to prioritize and actually embody your values during tough situations where it’s easier to NOT embody your values.

Overall, there are some arguments that support the notion that character can potentially be seen as a skill, something that can be developed or strengthened.

If THAT is the case, then an argument that can potentially follow is, if repetition is important for skill building, then repetition can also develop your character right?

That’s why in this episode, in the context of solopreneurs building a thought leader business and personal brand, the question is, “How can you do the mundane, ordinary things in a committed, enthusiastic, and extraordinary manner?”

I still remember back in the day when I worked in a laboratory setting doing highly repetitive and super, super dry, boring tasks like 98% of my work in the lab.

For context, I worked in a lab during my third and fourth year of my undergrad where I looked at the working memory processes of the parvalbumin and cholecystokinin interneurons in the medial prefrontal cortex.

To do this, I had to perform behavioral experiments and some surgical procedures on mice, used optogenetics and immunohistochemistry methods, and analyzed mouse brains using confocal microscopes. But let’s be honest, these are the sexier parts of my job scope.

The bulk of my actual work was super basic, super boring, and nothing worth mentioning on my CV.

It was probably during this phase of my career when I really learned to appreciate the importance of doing the fundamentals and doing it consistently.

Sure, it’s mundane and boring right now. It’s super ordinary and nothing to flex about on LinkedIn, but you know what? Over time, it’s this foundation that lets me do bigger, cooler, more extraordinary things.

The more I look around at what cool shiny things other people are doing, the more distracted I am from honing my craft that’s right in front of me AND is crucial for the foundation I’m building upon for years to come.

The same goes for building your business.

The boring work that you’re doing right now – none of it is ever going to waste. This work matters.

Also, your consistency shows to others that you care about what you do and that you care about your people.

Putting all of this together: Commitment and consistency is a win-win approach for you to build a sustainable business that’s here to stay.

Lesson 2: Own your shortcomings and insecurities

The more you try to cover up what you *think* you’re lacking in, the more YOU will question YOURSELF in those specific areas.

For example, the more you shy away from how little years of coaching experience you have and instead try to cover up by overpromising what you can help clients with, the more YOU will question whether YOU can really help them.

For me, especially in recent months, I’ve been increasingly embracing OWNING what I feel insecure about. Some of the actual thoughts that rummage through my mind these days include:

“Cheryl, who the fuck are you trying to teach on thought leadership???????”
“People you meet IRL (in real life) or people on LinkedIn are going to roll their eyes and think you’re just trying to make money without any substance.”
“There’s no way you can sell your coaching unless you’re promising quantifiable monetary results – People don’t THINK they need 1) coaching in general 2) help with their content, confidence, etc.”
“You are not as legit as coaches who make money or people working in an established traditional career.”
“Your brand is not professional or legit enough.”
“You are not as good looking as other peeps on the Internet.”
“Your dream isn’t like a “BOSS BABE GROW TO 7 FIGURES BUILD AN EMPIRE BE YOUR OWN BOSS” life – it’s just not legit enough. Sit down.”

“Owning” my insecurities looks like several things for me.

It could look like:

1) Being open about what are my current areas for growth and what I can improve on, especially in the context of my business. Doing so has helped me create more peace in my work.

2) This could also look like leaning into my natural gifts and strengths.

3) It could look like building my intrinsic motivation to put myself in a learning environment again so I can *actually* fill in my gaps through knowledge and skill-building.

For example, one way I’m leaning into my true strengths is creating a new way to work with me. The program is called COWORK & CHILL with Cheryl. In a nutshell, COWORK & CHILL with Cheryl (CCC) is a 3 month experience designed for solopreneur podcasters, by a fellow solopreneur podcaster.

It is specifically created for the podcaster who

Is struggling to stay consistent with your show
WANT to build your name as a podcaster but the process is just taking so damn long and you feel a lot of friction. Every. Single. Week.
LOVE the feeling of publishing a new episode and you are stoked to share your podcast on social media. But then you dread having to start the process all over again for your episode next week.

CCC is designed to help you with 3 things:

Get shit done in a lighthearted and efficient AF way – We will get a LOT of things done for your podcast. Get ready to become a speedy content ninja. For real! I want you to do good work, create good content, and help a lot of people. And still be able to go out and live your life.
Become prolific and consistent with your body of work – What’s likely going to happen is that you’ll have more content output than ever before (without needing to spend more hours per week on this). When you have a consistent and compelling body of work that reflects your voice, THIS is precisely what will set you up for cool ass opportunities in 2024 and beyond.
Recognize your own voice and express that confidently through your podcast – Through my prompts and questions, you’ll start to see your own work from a different perspective. I’ll help you pick up on the nuances of your voice and identify when/where/how you’re *trying* to speak like someone else.

I created this new offer for two reasons:

1) I genuinely believe that being a prolific and consistent podcaster CAN be done in a relaxed way. You CAN get a TON done quickly, efficiently, and with ease. And therefore free up hours of time to go live out the other parts of your life.

2) This is something I’ve been able to become really, really good at AND I’ve helped a number of clients become prolific and consistent podcasters AND still be able to have a chill life.

Now, for those of you who are now super super intrigued about COWORK & CHILL with Cheryl, you can head over to https://cheryltheory.com/ccc to read all about this new program and take the next step when you’re ready. I’ll drop the link in the show notes as well.

There we have it. Lesson #2 is owning your insecurities, which could look like:

1) being more open about what your current areas for growth are and what you can improve on

2) leaning more into your natural gifts and strengths

3) building up your intrinsic motivation to put yourself in a learning environment again so you can *actually* fill in your gaps through knowledge and skill-building

Onwards to lesson 3, which is, I don’t need to impress anyone.

Lesson 3: I don’t need to impress anyone

Nope. Fuck that.

Being deeply grounded in myself and expressing who I truly am, matters way more than trying to fluff up my feathers to impress people on the Internet, clients, my colleagues in the industry, or people I know in real life.

5 years of building my brand and business has, on one hand, helped me develop a thicker skin, but on the other hand, it has also softened me in the sense that I don’t feel like I need to put up a front.

I can truly be relaxed and show up just as I am.

Perhaps, this is why over the years, I’ve had countless people comment on how authentic my brand is. Or how authentic I show up. I’ve also had clients say they want to show up more authentically, the way I do.

Perhaps this is also why I believe that we each have our own unique thought leadership and STYLE of leadership.

Because when you’re really owning YOUR stake of thought leadership, first, you won’t feel the need to impress others. And second, what tends to happen is that you simply start to express who you genuinely are and share what’s on your mind. This self expression is what leads others to naturally gravitate toward you.

One exercise that has been profoundly helpful for me, is to ask myself, “If I didn’t feel the need to impress others, what kind of thought leader would I be?”

Let me share with you what I wrote down:

A thought leader who is a calming presence for others yet have bursts of energy and wholesome vibes.
A thought leader who is genuine and sincere.
A thought leader who is committed to their work → This leads them to be prolific and consistent with ease.
A thought leader with very high work ethic – They have the capacity to outwork people in a consistent, calm way. They will show up no matter what their external circumstances are.
A thought leader who is warm and friendly, and wants to get to know you and your story. They are also transparent in sharing what they know.
A thought leader who is honest and will share what they think, even if it means risking the relationship.
A thought leader who is consistent – People can rely on them to show up and they can expect a certain standard of excellence.
A thought leader who is earnest and enthusiastic especially when it comes to things they are excited about.
A thought leader who makes decisions quickly and takes action quickly – They fail forward and learn at an accelerated pace.
The way they show up leads their people to love being around them and want to be around them → A thought leader who attracts similar, like-minded people.
A thought leader who is willing to pivot, experiment, and figure out what changes they can make (rather than flat out quitting if something isn’t working).
A thought leader who is relentless when it comes to their goals – They will show the hell up and talk about their work.
If things aren’t working, they will lean into creativity and do things differently. If they are seeing themselves stagnate, they know it’s time to shake things up.
A thought leader who has their own version of power, influence, and leadership.
A thought leader who doesn’t try to be someone they’re not – They know they just need to be 100% themselves and radiate that out into the world.
A thought leader who isn’t trying to impress the whole world in order to be powerful and influential – They know they just need to be the leader for their people.

Every time I come back to read this list, it helps me feel tremendously grounded.

It grounds me because too often do we get swayed by others around us or what we see. It’s easy to feel inadequate or lacking. As if we need to be more this, more that, less of this, less of that.

But every time I reflect back on who Cheryl is truly YEARNING to become, it’s calms me the fuck down and guides me towards showing up the way that is most in integrity with me.

That is perhaps one major contributor to why I’ve been able to stay in this “game” of entrepreneurship for 5 years and counting.

In summary: express, not impress. THAT is going to make lightyears of a difference in building a sustainable business and brand that is not just lasting, but also genuine, and in integrity with you and your people.

Lesson 4: The first few years of trial and error are necessary for shaping you to become the entrepreneur you’re meant to be

For many of us building an online business, the first few years are likely marked by exploration and finding out what works and what doesn’t.

More often than not, this time will also be characterized by experiences that provide valuable lessons that then pave the foundation for the wisdom we need for years to come.

Honestly, there were seasons in my business journey thus far that felt intensely discouraging and challenging.

But as I’m entering my 5th year of entrepreneurship, I can more deeply appreciate that the experiences I’ve gone through (or still going through) are vital for my personal evolution as a human being and as an entrepreneur.

I’ve shared many lessons of my business journey on past episodes on this show, so here are 3 episodes I’d recommend you to bookmark and listen to after this episode:

Highly, highly recommend these episodes because you’ll hear a further deep dive on the lessons that have allowed me to build a sustainable business for 5 years and counting. Lessons from going from side hustler to full-time entrepreneur, and other behind-the-scenes insights from my journey.

Right now, although I don’t consider myself a “seasoned entrepreneur” by any means, I’d like to see myself as more mature than I was five years ago.

There’s still a lot of nuggets from the past few years that I need to synthesize and internalize, but I’m definitely way more aware of who I am and have a much clearer vision for the direction I’m heading towards, both in life and in business.

In summary, lesson 4 is all about being open to all of the ups and downs that you’ll navigate. There will be a LOT of experimentation, uncertainty and trial and error. All of this is NECESSARY for you to stay in the game for the long term.

That said, don’t just half ass these challenges or lessons. Because the more you resist, ignore, or gloss over certain lessons, the more these particular patterns or situations will keep popping back up UNTIL you actually learn the lessons you’re meant to learn.

Sounds good. Awesome.

Now onwards to the fifth and final lessons for today, time will pass, so what are you going to do with this time?

Lesson 5: Time will pass… So what are you going to do with this time?

Time and time again, in the past five years, I’ve seen that if there’s something you genuinely desire, NOW is the time to get your ass to work.

Meaning: Please, stop waiting before XYZ is in place. Make a decision, NOW. Start putting in the reps, NOW. Commit to your goals, dreams, and vision, NOW.

For reals. Otherwise, you’ll just be waiting another 4 months, another 6 months, another year… This is time you’ll never get back.

For example, many people I speak to have commented on how much they would love to have my current lifestyle. A very chill, relaxed solopreneur lifestyle.

But it took several years to build my business to a point where I felt sufficiently safe to leave my previous career, and it took years for me to develop the necessary skill sets and mindsets that have allowed me to reach a point where I could quit my academic career to pursue this business as a full time career.

And hey, I’m still learning to sharpen certain skill sets and mindsets even two years after leaving my PhD in 2022.

My business still isn’t where I want it to be, but I’m much better off than I was a few years ago. Five years ago. Because time and time again I just started to do the work, today. Over and over again, I chose to do something even though I felt massive resistance or hesitation of self doubt.

I continued to put myself in a beginners situation over and over again in order to be better and do better as an entrepreneur. All because I chose to just do something, over and over again, pretty much every single day since I started this journey five years ago.

The way I see it, it’s a decision. It’s a decision whether or not to grow. It’s a decision whether or not to make progress towards your goals.

When it comes to building a sustainable thought leadership business and brand, it really is just making decisions, day after day. A decision to commit to doing the basics over and over again, consistently. A decision to learn the lessons you need to learn and integrate, instead of just avoiding it.

The world doesn’t wait for you. So as time continues to tick, it’s your choice whether to take the next step forward even if it seems like the most mundane and insignificant step, versus staying exactly where you are.

So the question is: What are you going to do with this time? I’ll let you decide 🙂

There we have it. 5 lessons from the past 5 years.

I hope that you and I will continue to journey together for many more years to come and I am committed to supporting you however I can.

Thank you so, so much for listening to this episode and I’ll see you all in the next one.

Sounds good? Awesome. Let’s get to work.